They Started It!How to Help Your Children Get On
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Children and siblings will fight, and theres nothing you can do about it!
Is this really true?
Does it really help children to prepare for the trials of adulthood, or can it do lasting damage?
As any parent of more than one child will tell you, competition, jealousy and constant fighting is often a reality. For much of the time its just playful, but it can be relentless, disruptive and damaging to family life. For some, unresolved childhood conflict can last well into adulthood.
But how can parents find ways of keeping the peace, while allowing the natural differences between their children to flourish?
This easy-to read and highly informative book helps parents to help their children live alongside each other. Using a broad range of case studies and the real life experiences of both parents and children, readers will understand what it means to be a sibling and the easy-to-follow tips and practical advice will demonstrate how to make family life more manageable for everyone.
- How a new baby can impact children and family life
- Your child's place in the family and how it can affect their view of the world, their self confidence and their interaction with others
- Exploring jealousy and the 'hard done by' attitude
- Dealing with fighting, argumenst and squabbles firmly and fairly and what to do if things get out of hand
- Promoting and maintaining peace when you're not there to enforce it
Take that baby back!
The anecdotes are often hilarious, but there is no doubt that the arrival of a sibling can have a huge impact on a child. How to handle the inevitable changes in your relationship with your first child when the second one comes along. And what happens when subsequent children are born.
Im bigger than you.
Can your place in the family really affect your relationships, view of the world and interactions with others right into adulthood? This chapter explores whether oldest, middle and youngest child syndromes really exist, and the extent to which birth order affects the way children are treated.
Its not fair!
Exploring jealousy and the powerful role it can play. All children seem to think that their parents treat their siblings differently, with each child being convinced that he or she is coming off worst. Do parents unwittingly display favouritism or reinforce the differences between their children?
One of a kind
How to manage twins so they can establish independent identities and what to do when twins are so different that they have nothing in common.
Exploring how children fight, and what provokes the arguments. How to deal with constant squabbling and petty fights, and what to do when things get out of hand (like Roy and Gemma Taylor in Teen Angels, who were knocking seven bells out of each other). Also how to deal with petty teasing, provocation and verbal unpleasantness.
Behind closed doors
The assumption is often that children only fight to get their parents attention, but much of the conflict which occurs between children takes place away from their parents view. How can you prevent the resentments from bubbling over when youre not there?
What else is going on?
Sometimes when children fight they are acting out difficulties in other areas of their lives. If there are problems with the parents marriage for example, or if a child is being bullied at school, they may see this reflected in their childs interactions with his siblings. Jay Cooper was extremely violent towards his brother, because he had witnessed his mother being beaten by her partner. How parents can think more closely about what their childrens fighting can tell them.